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You Are Welcome Here COVID-19!

It was a rainy Monday, July 1, 2020 and I was not in my right mind. That day, I was not aware of my surroundings because I was preoccupied with a horrifying hallucination of being in hell. I could see the demons and the fire. I found myself descending the stairs in a guarded fashion, holding on to the banister, and gingerly placing one foot at a time on each step.

     “Oh, there you are,” my husband Ellis said. “Here is your lunch, sit down and eat.” “What’s wrong honey?” He asked.

I was unable to answer him because I was in a state of horror.

I found myself walking around in circles screaming at the top of my lungs.

          “Renee, Renee, stop screaming. Please settle down. Please sit down,” he said in a soothing voice.

     I began to quiet down. “I’m calling Dr. Turner. I think that you need to go to the hospital,” Ellis said. Within five minutes he reached the doctor.

     “Hello, Dr. Turner, Renee is having hallucinations and is screaming at the top of her lungs. What should I do?” Ellis told the doctor. He listened to Dr. Turner’s reply and hung up the phone.

     I was sitting in the chair shaking and crying. “Come on Renee, we are going to the emergency room.” “Sit there for a moment, eat your lunch. I’m going upstairs to pack some clothes for you.” He went upstairs, packed some of my belongings, helped me put on my raincoat, took me to the car, and drove us to the emergency room. Ellis put me into a wheelchair that was in the lobby. I was still shaking from my hallucinations as I was biting my coat and crying.

     A nurse named Thelma, called me and Ellis into the office and proceeded to ask him some questions. “Is she suicidal?”,

     “No,” Ellis replied.

     “Has she tried to harm someone?” She asked him.

     “No,” Ellis replied.

     Thelma then requested other information from him.

     “You have to leave now, Ellis, due to COVID,” Thelma said. She walked over to my wheelchair and pushed me through a hallway. She took me into a room. “Take off your coat and lie down on the stretcher, Renee.” The psychiatric nurse will be in to see you shortly,” Thelma said as she walked out of the room.

     Within a few minutes the nurse came in. I was preoccupied with being in hell, and murmuring to myself that I did not notice her at all. She touched me and got my attention.

     “My name is Rhonda, what’s your name?”

     “My name is Renee,” I replied.

     “We can’t put you into our facility because we do not have any beds left,” Rhonda said. “The social worker will be in to discuss with you where you would like to be sent to.” “We will have to do some blood work and a CAT Scan on you today.”

     The social worker came into the room about fifteen minutes later to discuss where I would like to be sent. I was served dinner. As was told me, blood was drawn and a CAT Scan of my brain was done. I was awake all night. The ambulance came in the morning to transport me to the mental hospital. I fell asleep while I was being transported. When I awakened the hallucinations were not quite as bad as they had been the day before. My mind was a little clearer. However, I was still having them. 

       It was late morning when I arrived at my destination. The admission process was lengthy, but I was use to it. This was not my first time being admitted to a mental hospital. There is always lots of paperwork. My mind kept drifting in and out of reality, so much so that I had to be cued back in several times.  

     The psychiatric aide, Brenda, opened the bag with my personal belongings in it. She put the contents on the table and began to sort them into two piles.

     “One pile is for items that you can’t bring into the hospital for safety reasons and the second pile for items that you can bring into the hospital,” Brenda said.  “I’m going to make an itemized list of the items that you can have,” Brenda said. “The other things will stay down here under lock and key until you are discharged from the hospital.”

“Come on let’s go on to the unit,” Brenda said after everything was in order.

     We walked up the stairs to the first floor. I looked at the people and observed that the staff was wearing masks but only a few of the patients were wearing them. What is going on here. We are in the middle of a pandemic and some people aren’t wearing masks. This is NOT good.

     “I’m going to take you to your room,” Brenda said. When we entered the room she said, “Your bed is the one nearest the door.” Just then a lady came into the room. “Kate, this Renee your new roommate,” Brenda said.

     “Hi, Renee,” she said.

     “Renee, this is Kate,” Brenda said.

     “Hi, Kate,” I said.

     “It is time for lunch, I’ll see you two in the dinning room,” Brenda said as she walked away.

     “Where are you from?” Kate asked.

     “I’m from Havertown,” I replied.

     “Where are you from, Kate?” I asked.

     “I’m from Philadelphia,” she replied.

     “Come on, let’s go eat,” Kate said as we walked to the dinning room.

     As we entered, I saw a sight that I could not believe! There were about twenty-five people crammed into the room with NO masks on and NO social distancing between them! Kate and I sat together in the only two available seats.

     “Renee, here’s your tray,” Brenda said.

     “Thank you,” I replied.

     “Kate, here’s yours,” Brenda said.

     “Do you have any kids?” Kate asked.

     “Yes, I have a twenty-three year old son named Elijah,” I replied.

     “Do you have any grandchildren?” She asked.

     “No,” I replied.

     “How about you?” “Do you have any children or grandchildren?” I asked.

     “I have two boys and one girl”. “I don’t have any grandchildren,” Kate replied.

     “My oldest is a son, and his name is Kuran.” “He is twelve,” Kate said.

     “My daughter’s name is Keisha, and she is ten.”

     “My youngest is Kyle, and he is six.”

     “Well, let’s hurry up and eat before our lunch time is over,” Kate said.

     Before I knew it I heard---

     “Time’s up, give me your trays, lunch is over,” the psych aide Sonya said. “We are going out to get some fresh air, line up, at the door,” she said.

      When I got outside I sat down on a bench and interacted with my hallucinations as I murmured to myself. Sonya walked over to me to coax me to get up and be active, but to no avail.

     After sometime, Pat, another psych aide blew a whistle. “Come on, time to go in, put the balls back,” she said as we put them back and filed inside.

     “You’ll sit in the dayroom for group meeting,” Pat said.

     Once again, we were packed into the room with twenty-five people many of whom were no wearing masks nor social distancing.

     Pat walked into the room. “People, I’m tired of seeing many of you not wearing your masks,” She said. “Go to your rooms and get your masks and put them on.” “They must be on at all times,” she said.

     It is long pass time to enforce the rule. Several people were not wearing masks for the greater part of my time there. In addition, there were too many people in the room to practice social distancing. The people were saying by their actions, “we welcome you here COVID-19.” I’m going to get tested for COVID-19 when I get out of here.

     I was discharged from the hospital on July 21^st. The next day I went to get a COVID test done. It took two weeks to get the results. Thank God it came back negative. I read and article in a magazine that stated that mental hospitals are hot beds for the spread of COVID-19.